The collected wit and wisdom of Norm Peterson

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Captain Morgan

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Another site I visit brought up some great old quotes from Norm on Cheers....




Coach: Can I draw you a beer, Norm?
Norm: No, I know what they look like. Just pour me one.

Coach: How about a beer, Norm?
Norm: Hey I'm high on life, Coach. Of course, beer is my life.

Coach: How's a beer sound, Norm?
Norm: I dunno. I usually finish them before they get a word in.


Coach: What's shaking, Norm?
Norm: All four cheeks and a couple of chins, Coach.


Coach: What would you say to a nice beer, Normie?
Norm: Going down?





Coach: What would you say to a beer, Normie?
Norm: Daddy wuvs you.




Sam: What will you have, Norm?
Norm: Well, I'm in a gambling mood, Sammy. I'll take a glass of whatever
comes out of that tap.
Sam: Oh, looks like beer, Norm.
Norm: Call me Mister Lucky.



Sam: What do you say, Norm?
Norm: Any cheap, tawdry thing that'll get me a beer.


Sam: What do you say to a beer, Normie?
Norm: Hiya, sailor. New in town?


Sam: Whaddya say, Norm?
Norm: Well, I never met a beer I didn't drink. And down it goes.


Woody: What's your pleasure, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Boxer shorts and loose shoes. But I'll settle for a beer.


Sam: Hey, what's happening, Norm?
Norm: Well, it's a dog-eat-dog world, and I'm wearing Milk-Bone underwear.


Paul: Hey Norm, how's the world been treating you?
Norm: Like a baby treats a diaper.








Woody: Can I pour you a draft, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: A little early, isn't it Woody?
Woody: For a beer?
Norm: No, for stupid questions.


Woody: Hey, Mr. Peterson, there's a cold one waiting for you.
Norm: I know, and if she calls, I'm not here.



Woody: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: A flashing sign in my gut that says, ``Insert beer here.''




Woody: Hey, Mr. Peterson, Jack Frost nipping at your nose?
Norm: Yep, now let's get Joe Beer nipping at my liver, huh?


Sam: What are you up to Norm?
Norm: My ideal weight if I were eleven feet tall.



Woody: Nice cold beer coming up, Mr. Peterson.
Norm: You mean, `Nice cold beer going Mr. Peterson.'

Sam: What do you know there, Norm?
Norm: How to sit. How to drink. Want to quiz me?



---


"How's it going, Mr. Peterson?"
"Poor."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"No, I mean pour."


"How's life treating you, Norm?"
"Like it caught me sleeping with its' wife."

"Women. Can't live with 'em, pass the beer nuts."

"What's going down, Normie?"
"My butt cheeks on that bar stool."


"Pour you a beer, Mr. Peterson."
"Alright, but stop me at one.... make that one-thirty."

"What's the story, Norm?"
"Boy meets beer. Boy drinks beer. Boy meets another beer."

"What's going on, Mr. Peterson?"
"The question is what's going in Mr. Peterson. A beer please, Woody."
 
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