yuk yuk..

[john pen]

Lou was fixing a door and he found that he needed a new hinge, so he sent his wife Shirley to the hardware store.
At the hardware store, Shirley saw a beautiful teapot on a top shelf while she was waiting for Carl, the manager, to finish waiting on a customer.
When Carl was finished, Shirley asked "How much for the teapot?"
Carl replied, "That's silver and it costs $300!"
"My goodness, that sure is a lotta money!" Shirley exclaimed. Then she proceeded to describe the hinge that Lou had sent her to buy, and Carl went to the back room to find it.
From the back room Carl yelled, "Shirley, you wanna screw for that hinge?"
Shirley replied, "No, but I will for the teapot."
This is why you can't send a woman to a hardware store

 

[john pen]

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

 

[Nick Prochilo]

Quick moderaters.....delete this thread before it gets out of hand!

 

[cflatt]

Down in Flattrock, Tennessee they had a visitor last week, Seems a cowboy rode into town and stopped at the local beer joint for a drink.

Unfortunately, the local boys always had a habit of picking on strangers. This cowboy was fair game....

When he finished his drink, he found his horse had been stolen. He strode back into the bar, handily flipped his gun into the air, caught it above his head without looking and fired a shot into the ceiling.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU SIDEWINDERS STOLE MAH HOSS?"

No one answered .

"ALRIGHT," he said, "AH'M GONNA HAVE ANOTHER BEER, AN IF MAH HOSS AIN'T BACK OUTSIDE BY THE TIME AH FINISH, AH'M GONNA DO WHAT I DID IN TEXAS! AN AH DON'T WANT TO HAVE DO WHAT I DID IN TEXAS!"

Some of the locals shifted restlessly as the cowboy slowly, silently nursed his second beer. That done, he left the saloon and discovered his horse had been returned . He saddled up and prepared to ride out of town.

The bartender wandered out of the saloon and asked, "Say partner, before you go ... what happened in Texas?"

The cowboy turned back and said, "Ah hadda walk home."

When things don't go your way, do you keep on doing what you've always done? Do you throw a fit or do you just walk away?