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Old 11-05-2005, 03:33 PM   #1
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: pa
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Woman-SpeakTranslator

A freind of mine sent this to me.


WHAT SHE SEZ: WHAT SHE REALLY MEANS:
"We need" I want
"This Kitchen is so ____" I want a new house
"I want new curtains" and carpet, and furniture, and ...
"I need a new pair of shoes" the other 40 are all the wrong color
"I only need a soap dish" We'll check out ALL the sale items
"Those are a bargain" Did you bring your checkbook ?
"Does this dress look OK ?" I need a new wardrobe
"Look at this coat!" Is VISA maxed out ?
"You're so attentive tonite" Is sex all you ever think about ?
"It's just... I'm soooo tired" Get away from me, you sex maniac
"It's been such a hectic day" Get away from me, you sex maniac
"Hon! I just did my hair" Get away from me, you sex maniac
"Are the kids asleep ?" Get away from me, you sex maniac
"Won't you be late for work ?" Get away from me, you sex maniac
"Turn out the lights first" My thighs looked flabby today
"Of course I like making love" Is this gonna take much longer ?
"You're ... so manly" You need a shave and a shower
"You have such a manly scent" For God's sake. Use some deodorant
"My, don't you look comfortable" Go put on a shirt, slob
"So nice to see you relaxing" Don't sit around in your underwear
"I'm not upset !" Of course I'm upset, you moron
"I'm not emotional !" You'd be too, if you married an idiot
"I'm not mad at all" I can't believe you're that stupid
"Yes, I'm still talking to you" I can't believe you're that stupid
"I'm not being quiet" I can't believe you're that stupid
"Nothing is wrong" Other than you're such an asshole
"Hang the picture there" NO -- there ! Can't you listen ?
"Hon, I hate to interrupt..." Turn off the damn TV
"When you get a chance ..." Get up & do it rite now !
"When you get time ... " Get up & do it rite now !
"I just remembered ..." Get up & do it rite now !
"No hurry, but ..." Get up & do it rite now !
"Did you lock the front door ?" Get up & go check, now !
"I think I heard a noise" Get up & go check, now !
"Was that the baby ?" Check the baby & change/walk him
"Just reminding you" I've asked you a dozen damn times
"Do you love me ?" I want something expensive
"How much do you love me ?" I did something terrible
"Be ready in a minute" Find a game on TV
"Is my butt fat ?" Tell me I'm beautiful
"Do you like this lipstick ?" Tell me I'm beautiful
"Should I get my hair cut ?" Tell me I'm beautiful
"Yes" No
"Maybe" No
"Well... we'll see" No
"Perhaps" No
"If you think so" No
"Let's think about it" No
"Shouldn't we wait ?" No
"Let's not rush things" No
"No" NO !!! NEVER !!! NO WAY !!!
"I'm sorry" You'll be sorry
"Do you forgive me ?" You'll be sorry
"Well, I was upset" You'll be sorry
"Well, I was tired" You'll be sorry
"Well, I had a headache" You'll be sorry
"Do what you want" You'll pay for this later, big time
"Do what you think best" You'll pay for this later, big time
"You know more about it" You'll pay for this later, big time
"As I recall, it was your idea" You'll pay for this later, big time
"Yes, I've calmed down" You'll pay for this later, big time
"I realize it was my fault sweetheart" You ain't seen nothing yet !
"It's your decision" The correct decision is obvious
"Sure... go ahead" Don't you dare, you clown
You like this recipe ? It's easy to fix
"Do you want to eat out ?" I forgot to go grocery shopping
"What do you want for dinner ?" I don't feel like cooking
"You seen that new restaurant ?" I don't feel like cooking
"It's your Mother's recipe" You'd better damn sight eat that
"You liked that the last time" You'd better damn sight eat that
"Don't want to talk yet" Go away, I'm building up steam
"Just need some time to think" Go away, I'm building up steam
"We need to talk" I need to complain
"Learn to communicate" Just agree with me
"I am not yelling !" This is important, you idiot !
"Are you listening to me ???" [Too late, you're dead]
"Our anniversary's coming up" When I think of who I could've married
"The kids were so bad today" Your gene pool needs more chlorine
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